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Running the Gauntlet in Singapore

Posted by Lance Powers

Barely coherent, covered in a bizarre white powder and whiskey sick I managed to make it back to my condo after narrowly escaping a wickedly dangerous visa run to Singapore. Nearly a week ago I met up with a host of Bangkok hotties who were raging full on in the SG and asked me to come join them for what I knew would be deadly good fun. I decided to turn a boring visa run into a hands on investigation of the newly crowned nightlife capital of Southeast Asia. What follows is a brief recap of what I can remember.

Less than an hour after touching down in Singapore I immediately quizzed a taxi as to the locations of nightclubs offering Ladies Night style drink specials. I was given the location as Mohamad Sultan Rd. and walked into the WU Club slightly dazed from my valium & Milo cocktail I had on the plane. The doorman politely informs me that girls get in for free and guys pay $25 for entrance. Unbelievably he adds that drinks are free until 12:00am. I peel out, order and immediately devour what must have been a dozen whiskies when it dawns on me that this place is completely off the hook. Hot girls of all colors, shapes and sizes are climbing the walls pissed, and at least half of them are eyeing up Lance Powers' pouty package. Downing a piece of cialis I find in my jeans I almost instantly remember the name of the local equivalent to Nana Plaza and run out to hail another cab.

Like everything in SG Orchard Tower looks like a shopping mall except for the fact that all of the shops are actually large disco's and pubs crawling with freelancers. Thai, Vietnamese, Phillipino, Chinese, Indonesian, Malay - they are all here and competing heavily for your multicolored Sing dollars. If you are not immediately covered in hot high class bogeys you must have been hit really hard with the ugly stick. As I have been here before I head for the top floor and walk into Top Ten half corked and looking to get bent. Within about 20 minutes I spot my contact and proceed to make my friends from Bangkok as slammed as possible without interrupting their employment prospects for the evening. This works for about an hour after which none of them were of any use to anyone but me - mission accomplished. I convince the wildest one in the group that my hotel on Bencoolen Rd. is hella betta than the room she shares with her 3 friends. The 5 days that ensued can only be described as completely and utterly exhausting as I rotated through a gaggle of brown skin, hairless clams, and saliva.

Besides all the sport shagging that went on in Singapore I did manage to hit the best disco in town for a show I will not easily forget. Saturday night at Zouk James Lavelle mixed up some of the best tracks I have heard since being back in Canada at a party with at least 2000 people encompassing 3 separate discos. Me and my wild girl toy took to the dance floor for 6 solid hours of good music, dancing, colorful cocktails, and more quality pussy than I have ever seen, anywhere. The place is truly world class and certainly not to be missed if you're in town over the weekend.

As my girls were lavished with gifts all weekend I managed to secure a VIP pass to the F1 Grand Prix speedboat race held in Singapore on Sunday afternoon. There were 100,000 spectators and the event went off hard with free booze, food, entertainment, sexy promo girls, and of course the race itself. If you have a chance to see a world class speedboat race don't miss out, there are normally accidents and this event didn't disappoint with 2 rollovers and a direct collision. Props to Scott Gillman of the Emirates team on taking 1st place and team Italy for partying the hardest. Here is a shot of some of the event hotties which incidentally are a serious group of party freaks.

With some of the budget airlines the airfare on flights to Singapore is down in the 4000 baht range. I would fully recommend SG over KL for a visa run any day and I secured a 3 month tourist sticker in 24 hours without any problems for a reasonable $50. The clean air and streets, lack of traffic jams, and proficient English were also a welcome change. If you're looking for nightlife and have some cash to throw around you are pretty much guaranteed to enjoy your stay.

Posted Sep 20, 2004 at 02:20 PM | Permalink |